Day 3 of the KY Intimacy Experiment is the ” Everything Old is New Again” day. I really liked the description of this day. One section I liked, “Newness and novelty trigger the release of the potent brain chemicals dopamine and norepinephrine, both of which play a key role in sexual arousal. Novelty, mystery, and unpredictability all help foster sexual attraction, as anyone knows who's flirted with someone, or even indulged in watching pornography…..Researchers found that longtime couples were best able to reignite their romance by pretending they were strangers on a first date, probably because of the novelty-and neurochemical boost-that such role-playing provides.
Role-playing? Hmm, I was slightly embarrassed to even read this. The day part of the exercise was pretty tame. They ask you to first list as many things as you can you recall about your partner that turned you on when you first met and think about which of those is still true and add some recent things as well. Then you can think about the negative. My husband and I had alot of fun with this one. Making fun of how much we have changed over the years was surprisingly not as bad as I thought. They say to think about how the negative have gotten in the way of the postive. After all this, create a list of simple, acheivable situations that postive sentiment would overpower the negative. Its so easy to forget how things used to be.
The night activity was a little harder to do. It said to start out by heading out separately to a pickup spot and basically make up a new persona for yourself. You would then approach your partner like they were a total stranger and try to pick them up. Flirt outrageously, buy them drinks, and try to think about who else in the meetup place is looking at you, who else wishes you were flirting with them. Now having an 8 month old and no close family, we were pretty much stuck at home. We did practice in the livingroom after he went to bed however and had a lot of fun making up who we would be and how we would act.
Now on to Day 4!
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